Too Busy for Thank You’s?

Dear PB Pro,

I’m feeling swamped with wedding planning and have my first bridal shower next month. I’m excited and so grateful, but a little stressed about adding yet another thing to my “to do” list — like sending thank-you notes. How much time do I have to send cards after the bridal shower vs. after the wedding?

— Thankful Bride

Dear Thankful Bride,

There’s such a range of opinions when it comes to thank-you cards. My mom always said to send them immediately or within seven days of the party. I’ve also heard you have up to one year after the wedding to send a formal thank-you — but that is way too long. I know it’s hard when you feel so busy, but set up a system and give yourself a deadline and you’ll be fine.

Always remember that no matter how busy you might be, so are your gift-givers. They took the time to shop for you and to find something thoughtful or choose something from your registry that they knew you’d love. Sending a thank-you note within two weeks of receiving the gift at your bridal shower shows you’re not only grateful for the present but also appreciative of the time they spent thinking of you. Looking ahead to wedding gifts, since there will be so many, it’s okay to take a few months — but no more.

My mom taught me a good trick years ago: Set a goal of writing four to six thank-you cards each day. As guests give/send gifts (be it for a shower or the wedding), write those cards as soon as possible to stay on track. You can be sure you’ll receive a good number of gifts on your actual wedding day, so sending thank-you notes for any pre-wedding gifts before the wedding will help you in the long run.

Now go and enjoy the bridal showers, the parties, and the wedding itself! Just take a deep breath, relax, and make time to be truly grateful for this exciting time in your life.

— The PB Pro

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